It's a "Short" story!

Tonight I have a serious problem to discuss. It’s something that I’ve thought about a lot over the years, it’s something that people constantly ask me about and I just laugh it off and change the topic but somewhere deep down it does bug me a teeny tiny bit so I decided that I would finally talk about this.

Good evening toastmasters and welcome guests… tonight I would be answering a question that I haven’t answered before… “How does it feel to be a really short person?”

• And before you go “Whoa! Is this even an actual thing…?” let me introduce you to some real and tad bit awkward questions that I have been asked over the years…
• -          Some people are pretty straightforward… They don’t beat around the bush. They directly come up to me and ask me “Wow! You are really short! Don’t you wish you were taller?”
• -          Or the witty ones will go “How is the weather down there?” Seriously?
• -          Some are seriously concerned and they ask… “Didn’t you hang from beams when you were young?”
• -          Or the Indian version of it… “Didn’t your mom give your Complan?” (Complan is a nutritional drink which supposedly increases height)

And don’t even get me started on the jokes…

• -          In my college days, my friends and I were called the penguin gang… and to paint you a word-picture… yes, we were all of a similar height and no you don’t have to be of my height to be my friend but hey whatever… penguins are extremely cute!
• -          Not to mention… every time I go to a club or a bar, I’m asked to show my ID card… Not anyone else in the group… just me. As if somebody has tagged their kid sister along. And when I try to explain that I am old enough and married… they always respond with… “Aww but you look like a kid… you should be happy about it”… Well sure, give me a drink in my hand first and then I will be happy about it.
• -          And it’s just my luck to have come to a country where people are even taller than they were back home… yes I am looking at all of you… Sometimes I feel like there should be two of me stacked on top of each other to reach a normal height!
• -          And I haven’t even got to the part about shoes… Here’s a secret… I have to sometimes buy shoes from the kiddie section because apparently there are no adult shoes below size 5. Good luck trying to get high heels in the kiddie section…

Now before everyone starts feeling sorry for the poor lil’ me, well things were not always so bad… There was a time when even I was at the back of class photographs and my mom was complaining that she had to buy new school uniforms each year. But then… tragedy struck and I stopped growing… well vertically at least. And thus began the years of torture…

As I was reading more about difficulties faced by short people in this ‘oh great big world… I came upon the term “heightism” … discrimination against people with short height. People tend to take you less seriously when you are trying to make a point and make a face which is like ‘run along lil’ girl’. There are certain professions you can’t even get into… yes my dreams of being a model were shattered… shattered I tell you! My husband hides things on top of cupboards if he doesn’t want me to get to them… So please… the next time you think of doing any of those things remember, you may be discriminating!

Like with any situation, being short can have plenty of advantages! … Just think of travelling on flights, trains, buses… I don’t need extra leg space… I just crawl up in my seat and I’m good to go! I’m always in the front of photographs, there is no chance of getting covered up! No bed is too short for me and even a couch will do just fine. Not to mention when I am at any crowded concert, I can just weave my way through crowds and nobody even notices… in fact they help me move to the front!

So to all short people out there… Just hold your head up high, just ask someone taller to reach for the stuff you can’t and remember, even short men can cast long shadows!

Thank you.

Just another day...

Yesterday, while waiting for a train at one of New York's subway stations, I heard a girl playing a violin. As she played, she also swayed to a hula hoop... a soft, slow dance that was beautiful to watch. The music she played was a sad tune... it reminded me of painful thoughts. It was a hauntingly beautiful but melancholic experience... a juxtaposition of the soft, slow music with the ruthless clash of metal trains against the tracks. Its strange when  you are just going about your day... a mundane, routine day... and you suddenly come across something which is seemingly random... but which leaves a lasting impact on you.

It was a tune which brings back everything you regret in life... the person you didn't love enough or the person you loved too much, an experience that you should have pursued but somehow let go of, the wasted times, the risks you did not take, people that you'll never meet again. In a span of fifteen minutes, I was transported to a different place, a place that is haunted by regrets. She continued playing, completely unaware of the effect of her music. The trains continued to come and go... like life flashing past. And suddenly I felt like I had to be at a million different places doing a million different things. That if I did not, I would miss out on many more things.

Of course, I never did leave the platform. I continued to wait for my train, continued glancing at my phone, tapping all the million different social apps that professed to  make me feel more connected. And in that moment I felt completely disconnected as if I was watching myself sitting at that platform. Crowds of people continued their day around me, moving in and out of trains in a hurried frenzy. Nobody stopped to listen to her music and yet she continued... swaying and playing.

My train finally arrived and I left that station, continued that random day till it ended. Only to be followed by another random day. I forgot what station it was, I forgot what that girl was wearing, even what she was playing. What I did not forget was the way that music made me feel... if only for fifteen short minutes. It made me feel regrets that I didn't know even know I had. For those few minutes, I would always remember you... stranger with the melancholic music!

Be Foolish...!

This is the story of how I made a complete fool of myself... well there are a lot of stories about that but we'll get to those later... and how I learnt that it is important to be a fool at times...

First... a sweeping statement... I absolutely love water (not just drinking and peeing)... I love the sea, I love swimming pools... I even love just sitting in the tub... So imagine how happy I was when I moved to Florida... No matter where I went, there was the ocean... So gorgeous, so calming... I loved it! There was only a tiny little problem... I didn't know how to swim at all. My mom says she took me for swimming classes when I was really small but I hated it... Yeah I think that one's made up... Thanks Mom..!

Not that I saw my inability as a problem, I didn't even care and it never stopped me from running into the waves or jumping into a pool. Fast forward to the summer of 2015 when my husband and I went for water sports in Keywest. Just to give a brief idea, there are these cruise companies that take you out on their boats to the middle of the ocean and you can take part in activities like snorkeling, parasailing, riding jet skis and so on. It was a really hot summer day and who wouldn't like to be in the cool ocean water? I was psyched... especially for the snorkeling because I would be trying it for the first time.

We went through all the training of how to put on the life vests and the tubes that go into the mouth and soon I was standing at the edge of the boat ready to go into the water. My husband, who had already done this trip before, had one piece of advice for me... "Whatever you do... do not let go of the rope"... So there I was about to go in... Laser focused on a rope which I could see bobbing in the water nearby... Sounds simple right? Well what I hadn't accounted for was the large number of Indians who were also in the same cruise group. We went into the water, I grabbed the rope, just about managing to keep my head above water and what do I see? Every inch of that rope was being held by an Indian. I understand, we come from a really crowded country…moving in crowds is probably our safety blanket. Naturally, the instructors were amused to see all these people hanging on to a rope for dear life. Just as I was about to relax and enjoy the water, I felt a tug and all of a sudden… my hands were no longer on my precious rope. There was a moment of clarity when I raised my arms and shouted “Help!” and then I was swallowing copious amounts of salt water. I’m thinking to myself… “Oh god… this is how it all ends” and flailing about in the water with my panicked husband beside me… The nearby instructor seems completely unfazed by all this and I’m thinking… “Isn’t this guy supposed to leap in and save me” (overdose of Baywatch I tell you)… Finally, after what seemed like ages, the instructor hands me a float and I get up on the boat again. Whew! I look around with new-found respect for life, after all I had just survived drowning and I run to my husband to hug him… and then the instructor says (really loudly)… “Yeah you had a life jacket on… you weren’t drowning… you did push a lot of the other people around…not cool”… I look down at my life jacket… look around to see some visibly angry Indians and for the rest of the trip… I was so mortified I stuck to my husband and didn't do anything crazy.

What did I learn from this really foolish and embarrassing experience?

• Do not try to jump into the middle of the ocean if you don’t know swimming. No matter how tempting it looks. If you still want to, wear a life jacket and more importantly, remember that you wore it.
•  Ropes are like comfort zones we have in life… We want to cling to them because they seem safe but sometimes life will just pull them away and we need to learn to live without them.
•  That day I made a fool of myself but there was something good that came out of it… I finally acknowledged that I needed to learn swimming and started taking some lessons for it. Of course there is still a long way to go before I become an accomplished swimmer but at least it’s a start. That’s the way it works in life as well… Sometimes we need to go out and do those foolish things and be embarrassed to push us to learn something new or to do something better. 

Be foolish… be embarrassed… be better than what you are today… !