Of heartbreaks and healing...

No relationship ever comes with a warranty of happily ever after. Everyday around the world, innumerable relationships end in heartbreak for at least one of the individuals. This blog is about how to deal with those times when the world seems to be crumbling around you and everything seems pointless. The answer, even though many would disagree with me, is not always at the bottom of the vodka bottle.

• Wake up, dress up and show up: I know it sounds tough but the most important thing is to go on with life. Everyday duties of life might seem very vague and pointless when you are going through a heart break, but believe me it is going to be a lot tougher when the haze lifts and you realize that you have missed important classes in college or that you have forgotten to pay necessary bills. It is easier said than done but if there is one thing that romantic comedies have taught us, it is that great things will happen once we pull ourselves off the couch and face mundane everyday life. And also that binge-eating will get you Colin Firth and Hugh Grant only in a movie!
• Stay way from the chocolates: Unless you are a person who never puts on weight no matter what they eat (yes that sounds like the ultimate dream), stay away from all the chocolates and ice-cream tubs. The candy aisle at the supermarket might seem to be the most enticing thing ever, but instead run in the opposite direction! While eating a bag of cookies and crying along with The Notebook  might seem appealing, no one ever felt better about a heart break after putting on weight. I have been through these routines and this is just a spiral down to the depths of misery.
• "Chaar bottle Vodka"?: If only alcohol could solve life's biggest problems, Devdas would be the next genius. Instead he is a sad, lonely (and dead) man. A few drinks might momentarily ease the pain and believe me, I am all for it. Having a few drinks with your girl friends followed by hours of discussing how men are not worth all the tears does help to vent your feelings. However, the challenge is to know where to stop because you know there is a thin line between poor wronged girl and creepy stalker who can't stop drunk-dialing her ex.
• A New Me: I have heard arguments against this but personally I think it works! A new haircut, a day at the spa, some retail therapy... all these help in confidence building. You might be the same person inherently but when your self-esteem is at a low, these are small things that can make you feel a little more confident. As long as you are not doing anything drastic, there is no harm in pampering yourself a little. Also, creating a new me does not mean suddenly quitting your job or deciding that you should move. Some decisions are life changing and needs rational thought. Others like buying that dress which your ex boyfriend didn't approve of, well just go for it! 
• Eat, pray, love: Some of the best travel stories are from people who decided to take a trip alone after suffering heart breaks. So instead of whining over what went wrong, this is the best time to venture out on your own with no one to dictate you. Go on the hike you always wanted to. Take the Zumba class you had been thinking about joining but never did. See new places and meet new people. You never know when your worst time could turn into your best experience. 
• Keep you friends close: When a person is going through a heart break, one of the most important pillars of support are friends. For girls this means late night phone calls, wiping each others' tears and hours of counselling. Followed by the unanimous decision that "all men are dogs". Boys on the other hand will spend exactly a minute discussing the heart break part and then spend hours playing video games/ drinking/ watching action movies. No matter what it is, friends have the capacity to get you through your worst relationship failures so it is important to invest in friendships. Who else will remind you that "He/She was not good enough for you. You deserve so much better"? Which brings us to the last thing.
• Exes cannot be friends: Think logically, you have enough friends already. Do you really want to maintain a challenging and draining friendship with someone who has caused you heart break? Often a healing process is completely defeated because people take the wrong decision of trying to remain friends after a break up. Face it, you will never be happy to see your ex with someone else. Let some things go because if it was meant to work, you would not be needing to make this decision at all.

To sum it up, every heart break takes its own time to heal. What we can do is to speed up the process and gain a new experience from it.
As always, thanks to my friends for holding my hands through many heartbreaks and helping me emerge a better person every time.