Have you ever been stuck in the chasm between waking up and sleeping? That space in time when your body is still asleep but your mind is half awake and trying to focus. Only it can't focus completely. So it imagines that it is awake and feels delusional because somewhere it knows that it is still in the realm of dreams but can't drag itself back. It also tries to force itself to awake completely but the body refuses to cooperate. I used to suffer from this phenomena quite frequently and I would either wake up in a sweat or slip back into a disturbed slumber. Either way, the feeling was not pleasant.
Now imagine this feeling in your daily life. Stuck in a space between your dreams and your reality, unable to focus completely, unable to let it go and continue dreaming. Sometimes in our life, we feel trapped in this kind of a situation and it is not a very pleasant one. We have this vague idea of what the reality should look like and feel like but we are unable to reach there. Instead we experience an alternate reality which we have no control over. Sometimes, stuck in that space between sleep and wakefulness, I would sense a negative energy in the room. I would try to escape that negative energy by waking up but because my body would not respond, I would be overcome by a sense of impending doom. That is exactly how we feel in life when we are unable to achieve our dreams and turn them into reality. It is then that the negative energies overcome us and trap us in a web of depression and sense of failure. In that state we feel our dreams slipping away and though we try to break away from our demons, we are frozen in a blank space.
The solution? It is one of the most discussed reaction of any living thing to a threat... flight or fight! In the beginning when I used to be stuck in a state of partial wakefulness, I would give up to the feeling of doom and let sleep take over. It just seemed like the easier thing to do. I would imagine the demons taking over me and tell myself that it would all be over soon. We do that in life too... accept depression, sink deeper into it and tell ourselves that it would be somehow be better. It would be easier than a seemingly useless fight. One day I was reading about the phenomena of this half-awake half-asleep state and I learnt that by trying to jerk our legs, we can break out of that state and wake up. The fascinating thing about our minds is that it just needs that small stimulus of hope. That is sometimes enough to push us out of situations that seem hopeless. The piece of information that I learnt helped me break out of the blank space.Was it a fight? Yes. But here is what I have learnt... always choose the fight.
I have heard a lot of stories of depression, about losing the will to continue... I also have phases when the impending sense of failure threatens to overcome everything. And I know it is easy to talk about it but much more difficult to deal with it. But I have also seen remarkable stories of strength and willpower against great odds. And they all have the same thing in common... they chose to fight. Find that strength, that hope, that small bit of information which will push you out of the space you are trapped in. It won't happen in a moment or maybe even in a long time but it will happen eventually. Don't let your demons win.
Now imagine this feeling in your daily life. Stuck in a space between your dreams and your reality, unable to focus completely, unable to let it go and continue dreaming. Sometimes in our life, we feel trapped in this kind of a situation and it is not a very pleasant one. We have this vague idea of what the reality should look like and feel like but we are unable to reach there. Instead we experience an alternate reality which we have no control over. Sometimes, stuck in that space between sleep and wakefulness, I would sense a negative energy in the room. I would try to escape that negative energy by waking up but because my body would not respond, I would be overcome by a sense of impending doom. That is exactly how we feel in life when we are unable to achieve our dreams and turn them into reality. It is then that the negative energies overcome us and trap us in a web of depression and sense of failure. In that state we feel our dreams slipping away and though we try to break away from our demons, we are frozen in a blank space.
The solution? It is one of the most discussed reaction of any living thing to a threat... flight or fight! In the beginning when I used to be stuck in a state of partial wakefulness, I would give up to the feeling of doom and let sleep take over. It just seemed like the easier thing to do. I would imagine the demons taking over me and tell myself that it would all be over soon. We do that in life too... accept depression, sink deeper into it and tell ourselves that it would be somehow be better. It would be easier than a seemingly useless fight. One day I was reading about the phenomena of this half-awake half-asleep state and I learnt that by trying to jerk our legs, we can break out of that state and wake up. The fascinating thing about our minds is that it just needs that small stimulus of hope. That is sometimes enough to push us out of situations that seem hopeless. The piece of information that I learnt helped me break out of the blank space.Was it a fight? Yes. But here is what I have learnt... always choose the fight.
I have heard a lot of stories of depression, about losing the will to continue... I also have phases when the impending sense of failure threatens to overcome everything. And I know it is easy to talk about it but much more difficult to deal with it. But I have also seen remarkable stories of strength and willpower against great odds. And they all have the same thing in common... they chose to fight. Find that strength, that hope, that small bit of information which will push you out of the space you are trapped in. It won't happen in a moment or maybe even in a long time but it will happen eventually. Don't let your demons win.
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